Top ten reasons you would not do this ride:

1. You’re trying to keep your bike clean for Opus.
2. You’re boycotting Flanders events until the French speaking southern region of Wallonia gets their own government!
3. You’ve spent all winter working on your Milky white skin tone. 20% chance of sun is too just risky.
4. You’re geared to peak at Black Dog 4. 7 steep climbs will blow your training program.
5. You totally have a man crush on Tom Boonen and you are afraid you’ll say something embarassing after a few Duvels.
6. The ebay auction for that fender ends on Monday. Don’t want to ruin that new white kit.
7. You grew a moustache in preparation and are pissed that you planned for the wrong ride.
8. I’m shaving my legs then.
9. You heard the Cat 6ers talk a lot of trash. You don’t feel you’ve committed enough “yo mama” comebacks to memory to be effective on the ride.
10. Rumors of a medical tent have been surfacing.